


Will the Real Spencer Reid Please Stand Up

by Casey_K



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Happy Ending, Hedonist Reid, Jealous Derek, Kidnapping, M/M, Potential Spoilers for Season 8, Unexpected Reid, alter ego
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 09:33:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14210229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casey_K/pseuds/Casey_K
Summary: Reid has secrets. He doesn't mean to have, but the team really aren't all that interested in seeing who he is, only who they want him to be, and that's okay because Reid likes his privacy.But when Reid goes missing, the team find out more than any of them bargained for.





	Will the Real Spencer Reid Please Stand Up

**Author's Note:**

> Contains talk of underage, multiple partners, and past abuse. Please be aware of these potential triggers before reading. 
> 
> Apologies for this not being as well rounded as I would have liked. I wanted to get it posted. I may revamp in the near future. Lots of dialogue, some threads could have been longer. I finished it up a bit quick, but hopefully you'll still enjoy it. Also, the timeline is a bit squiffy, and Alex Blake is single for this story line.

It always amazed Reid that for a group of top profilers the team failed to know anything about Reid he didn’t tell them himself. He never intentionally hid things from them—apart from Maeve, but that was different. That a team, often rated as the best the FBI had to offer could be so oblivious to one of their own, even with the promise not to profile each other, astounded him. He guessed they were so comfortable with who they thought Reid was they refused to acknowledge the Reid in front of them, and that was okay because Reid liked his privacy. He figured it was lucky for the world he wasn’t a serial killer because he’d get away with it for far too long. That probably wasn’t true. When they were out on cases there were plenty of local law enforcement who saw exactly who he was, and that was okay too, especially when Reid got to experience their confusion at how his own team treated him.

The fallacy that Reid was a virgin—or at least virginal—was perpetuated in part by each of his team members wanting the rest of the team to maintain the belief. That way, Reid presumed, the others wouldn’t see past the teasing to realise they were, in fact, sleeping with Reid. That Reid was sleeping with every member of his team—except Garcia now she had Kevin, and J.J. since she’d gotten serious with Will—without said team members knowing about each other was, well, it was odd. But he wasn’t complaining. He’d had some unfortunate experiences in the past when friends had realised he was sleeping with several of them. Not everyone was as easy going about sex and relationships as they liked to think. Reid didn’t understand it personally. He liked sex. Okay, he loved sex. And he was good at it, which was unusual for him and a physical activity, so he embraced it. Kind of like his work out routine. 

Being surrounded by profilers he deeply respected who had failed to recognise the impact graduating high school at twelve could have on an impressionable young boy was sometimes a conundrum. It was expected that his classmates wouldn’t be interested in a child sexually, which was true bar the occasional instance of bullying, but being a young impressionable child amidst all that sexual and hormonal tension was bound to have an effect. By the time Reid reached college he was so horny he could drill concrete. The thing most people failed to recognise was that he wasn’t the only early entrant at CalTech. By the age of fourteen Reid had given and received oral sex from and to both girls and boys. At that time, boys had been his preference. There were areas of the libraries the younger kids used to hang out, and they were a breeding ground of sexual experimentation. By sixteen Reid had fucked and been fucked. A lot. Again, both girls and boys. When it came to fucking he didn’t really have a preference at that stage, though the mechanics were less complicated with girls, you could just slip right on in. He was nineteen when he started to add older people to his repertoire, and why wouldn’t he, he had his own house off campus where he lived alone. He could even entertain the odd professor without anyone knowing. There was a comfortable familiarity with those older bodies—thirty, forty, fifty plus—who over the years had developed a sense of their own pleasure, much as Reid already had. He was a quick study, after all, and it didn’t seem to matter to them that he was socially awkward, they just wanted something young and hot to roll around with. 

It was around that time another interesting thing happened in Reid’s life his colleagues had no idea about. He was spotted on the street and recruited to a prestigious modelling agency. The idea was too bizarre to pass up, at least the money was, and travelling the world as a glorified clothes horse was an experience. The bonus was visiting museums, libraries, historical monuments, of trying out his grasp of languages, and of course having lots of sex with lots of beautiful people. Staying away from the drugs and alcohol was harder, but Reid appreciated his brain too much to compromise its integrity for a few hours of ‘fun’. He still had the occasional call from the agency for photographic work, and he sometimes went along if the team was between cases. He’d spotted a magazine he was featured in on Garcia’s desk one time, but he looked so different all dressed up and draped seductively around a beautiful woman, he figured even eagle-eyed Garcia would only see it as a passing resemblance. 

Sex was still the only thing Reid had discovered that switched off his massively overactive mind for more than a few minutes. Over the years he had tuned in to every single one of his erogenous zones. He knew them intimately. He liked other people to know them intimately. It didn’t need to be complicated. Reid was well on the way to categorising himself as a hedonist, although in his case it was the more traditional understanding given that as much as he loved the pleasures of the body, the pleasures of the mind were equally important. The quest for knowledge was still as heady and all-encompassing as a phenomenal fuck.

He still remembered the first time with each of his colleagues. There were others, outside the team he had regular sex with, some even in the FBI, but it was different. His team coddled him. It was almost as though they saw him as a precious commodity and their time with him was a gift. He wondered if that would end if they realised how many sexual partners, how much sex, he actually had. 

Hotch had been his first from the FBI. Reid was excited with the news from Gideon that he would be joining the BAU and had gone to a bar to celebrate, or at least to pick up someone with which to celebrate. Brimming with new confidence at his FBI appointment he decided to visit a well-known FBI hang out. He spotted Hotch at the bar. Nice looking, good age, and already eying Reid with interest. Of course, he hadn’t realised Hotch was part of the very team he’d be working with. He remembered with fondness, Hotch’s surprise at how forward Reid was once they made it to the hotel room. Reid sucked him to within an inch of his finish, prepared himself whilst Hotch reciprocated, before pinning Hotch to the bed and riding him into the early morning. Repeatedly. Hotch hadn’t even blushed when Reid walked into his first roundtable discussion two weeks later, just raised an interested eyebrow and given the slightest smirk. Once the case wrapped, they made their way to another hotel room and repeated the process with the added benefit of Reid topping part of the time. Hotch was married, but Hayley knew he occasionally picked up guys. She was very forthcoming about that fact the first time Reid met her. It had taken him an hour to stop blushing.

Garcia had been a revelation. The things that girl could do with her toes. It happened when Reid walked in on a very flustered ‘baby girl’ panicking she would never be able to work with someone as beautiful as Morgan who spoke to her that way—like she was special. After drinks, and food, and more drinks, they explored the concept of making people feel special, specifically making each other feel special. Oh, yes, he’d remember that one for a long, long time. Reid was sad when she called a halt to their thing, but he was pleased she had found someone she wanted to devote herself to even if he didn’t understand it. He hoped they could hook up again given the circumstances.

J.J happened slow and steady. It started with touching and cuddling. She was wary of what she called ‘using him’ just because she was single. There were a few stolen kisses, heated and intoxicating. After a particularly gruelling case Reid had brought her off in the car park with a hand in her pants as she clawed at his shoulders, and they were away. After the gentle start, Reid was the one who had been surprised by the pent-up passion J.J. let loose. Those were very fond memories. 

Morgan. Oh, Morgan, Morgan, Morgan. Complicated was the word that came to mind. He had also been surprised by Reid’s confidence. Given how long Morgan had made him wait it was more like desperation. A shared hotel room, and another awful case with too much adrenaline and too little sleep. Reid remembered how his blood felt itchy for action, it had been almost a week since he’d gotten laid and he hadn’t even found time to jerk off. The long lustful looks Morgan had been giving him for the last six months flipped a switch in Reid’s sex deprived body and he jumped Morgan in their hotel room. 

“Reid, what the hell are you doing?” Morgan fell back onto the bed, and Reid straddled his thighs. 

“I see the way you look at me, Morgan. Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll back off.” Reid reached down to kiss Morgan, pausing just before their lips met to give Morgan the option of turning away. Morgan surged up to meet Reid in a rough kiss, hands roaming and pulling at clothes. 

“You have me at a disadvantage, Pretty Boy.” Morgan’s breath came heavy as he held Reid at arm’s length to catch his breath. “I, uh, I’ve never done this—at least not willingly—before.” Reid pulled back. “Don’t you dare stop. I want this, Spencer. I want you.”

“Are you sure, though? Because I’ll admit I didn’t consider what this could bring up for you. The way you look at me, I figured you’d been with guys since…”

“I’ve wanted to. Despite evidence to the contrary, I am not always brave.”

“We can do as much, or as little as you want, Morgan. We can just cuddle.”

“Hell, no. Not after getting this far.”

“Oh, thank god. That would have been torture. Okay, what do you want? I can suck you off, or, just hands?”

“I think…I think I want you to fuck me.”

“That’s pretty full on for your first time exploring with guys.”

“I know you’ll look after me. I want you to show me it can be good.”

It was good. It was more than good, it was sensational. Morgan hadn’t been with a guy willingly, but he had been with a lot of women, and as such knew his body. Having sex with Morgan was a revelation, even for someone as experienced as Reid. It came with consequences, however. It activated a possessive streak in Morgan Reid didn’t know how to handle. By the time Seaver came along, Reid was considering ending things with Morgan altogether. They muddled through for a few more months, but in the end, Reid had to ask Morgan to tone it down. It led to an embarrassing outburst on a case where Morgan blurted out ‘I am not sleeping with Reid.’ He’d meant he wouldn’t share a room with him, but the looks the rest of the team gave Reid suggested they all considered something else. 

Prentis had been the one who wasn’t surprised at Reid’s obvious skillset. She was a competent and thoughtful lover and it was the real reason Reid had been so consumed when he thought she’d died. He still missed her. 

And now there was Alex Blake. Alex admitted she was more attracted to women, so their explorations were limited and more companionable than sexy. They’d made it all the way to orgasm once, but it wasn’t something they saw as a necessity. Alex was the only one who knew Reid was sleeping with the rest of team. It didn’t bother her. It was part of the reason the odd thing they had together worked. 

“Do you see a time when it will end?” she asked him.

“I don’t really look forward in that way. As people leave it ends naturally. Seaver and Prentis have gone. We keep in touch, but even with Seaver still in DC we don’t hook up anymore.”

“Natural ends are healthier. At least I’ve found it to be that way.” Alex handed Reid a cup of coffee. A companionable Sunday morning brunch after a full week out of the city. Reid had slept with Morgan and Hotch during the case so hadn’t felt the need to get out and get laid. “Do you think you will reach a point where you’d like to share your life, as well as your body?”

“I don’t see it as something I want to pursue for the moment, but I guess as I get older that may change. I think the relationship would need to be as much on an intellectual level, however.”

“In what way?”

“I can’t image sharing my home with someone who didn’t share my love of knowledge or books. It’s the one place I get to be truly myself.”

“You’re not yourself at work?”

“Within the team as much as I am anywhere, I suppose. But they tolerate rather than appreciate my quirkiness. If we are talking about sharing a life with someone in the more traditional context of a loving relationship, my companion would ideally love my mind, and my uniqueness, as much as my body and abilities in the bedroom.”

“I would say that pretty much sums up my single status too.” They both smiled and sipped their coffee. “What about Rossi? I don’t think you’ve told me that story.”

“Ah, David Rossi. Rossi struggles with our age difference. He indulges me occasionally, but I see it rests heavy with him. I make a point of waiting until he comes to me. He knows logically being attracted to me doesn’t make him an aging leech, but it’s how he feels once he’s ravaged me. I always think it’s best to allow people to face their own demons without interfering. He knows I’m available to talk, to support him when or if he needs it.”

“What about kids, do you see yourself as a father one day?”

“It’s not something I’m planning for. I have the genetic implications to consider. So far, I seem to have skipped the schizophrenic genetic lottery, but I did fall foul to the propensity for addiction, albeit not under my own steam. The risk of passing either or both of those things to another generation is too high.”

“Adoption?”

“Not a consideration for the moment. Maybe if one day I find myself sharing a life, I would be swayed by my partner’s wishes for family. How about you?”

“It’s never been a consideration. I have nieces and nephews. My interest in all things child end there.”

Reid nodded. “I like to visit with Henry. I take my role as a Godfather seriously. For now, that is more than enough.”

“How are things with Morgan?”

“Hmm, still challenging. I blame myself. I was too horny to appreciate the potential implications of a sexual relationship with him.”

“How so?”

“Without going into his background too much…”

“I know about his past, if that’s what you’re referring to.” Reid raised an eyebrow in query. “It came up during a case and he mentioned it when questioning a victim.”

“Oh, well, it seems I was his first willing sexual experience with the male gender. I’ve seen it before, not personally—I’m usually more mindful, where first times can result in a level of attachment greater than the act itself would usually create. I’m not sure Morgan has pursued any other male sexual partners in the years we’ve been sleeping together, and I also know he has less interest in picking up women.” 

“Do you think maybe he’s in love with you?”

“I don’t think it goes that far. He loves me, for sure, but ‘in love with’ probably not. Infatuated, in lust, potentially. We are extremely compatible in bed. More so, I would say, than any of my other regulars, or historical partners come to think of it. Though he is as much in denial of that as he is his sexuality.”

“You’re allowing him his demons the same as Rossi?”

“I guess so.”

“And if he were to tell you he loves you, wants to make a go of a more formal relationship?”

Reid frowned. “Are you speculating, or has he said something to you?”

“Oh, Morgan doesn’t confide in me. I’m just putting it out there.”

“Are you implying I may be in love with him, but not willing to see it?”

“I don’t know, am I?” Alex gave a gentle smile.

Reid frowned again. He was willing to admit his feelings, his interactions with Morgan were different than with his other regular sexual partners, but to what degree and for what reason he didn’t know. It hadn’t occurred to him to analyse it other than to acknowledge Morgan’s attachment and the potential cause. Reid had never been in love with a sexual partner. He had been in love with Maeve, but it was an entirely different experience and his basis for understanding that as love was built on completely unrelated observations than that of his relationship with Morgan. Did he have the capability to recognise love with a physical aspect should it ever sneak up on him?

“Are you okay?”

Reid looked up at Blake. “I think so.”

“Are you in love with Morgan?”

“I…I don’t know.” Reid sat up straight. “I don’t even know if I would know. If I was, I mean.”

“Isn’t it a thing you just know?”

“That usually relates to the release of chemicals, and actually is more common in lust rather than a deep abiding love. There are exceptions, of course. With Maeve, because we’d never met, I was able to base my observations outside of the usual context of physical attraction and lust. The feelings elicited through our conversations, the joy, and the fluttering sensations I experienced thinking of her, of us, therefore fitted more with an appropriation of love rather than lust or infatuation.”

“I see.”

“Have you ever been in love?” 

“No, I don’t think so. I thought so, once. But in hindsight it was little more than a crush. The way the air used to get sucked out of the room whenever she walked in…that is very memorable.”

“What happened?”

“She grew out of her ‘phase’ and married a very well to do man. Moved into a very large house and popped out the required heirs to the very sizeable family estate.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh, I’m not. It was a fascinating experience, and as I said, little more than a crush in reality. It wouldn’t have ended well.”

“I’m not proficient at recognising emotions in a personal context. The obvious ones, anger, sadness, lust, are easy but the more subtle emotions…love, jealousy, even admiration, those I find harder to distinguish. I’m not sure I would know if what I was experiencing was love or be able to distinguish between jealousy and general irritation. Although I can detect it in others. Aside from the obvious profiling exercises, I knew, for example, when Morgan was being possessive and jealous.”

“Maybe you should think about your feelings around him over the next few weeks and see what you find. Whatever the result it should be an interesting exercise, right?”

“I just might do that. Thank you for the suggestion.”

“You’re welcome. Did you want to visit the museum later?”

Reid smiled. “Sounds perfect.”

 

“What’s the emergency?” The team huddled in the conference room, bleary eyed and still slightly dishevelled.

“I’m sorry to gather you all so early, or late,” Alex said looking in Morgan’s direction. “I think Reid has been abducted.”

Jaws dropped, confusion reigned. Morgan tensed to the point Alex thought he might shatter completely. “You’re being serious?” Alex nodded, and Morgan plopped into a chair. 

“What do we know?” Hotch said, all calm efficiency and action as usual. 

Alex took a deep breath, this would not be easy. “He was due to meet me for brunch this morning, but he didn’t show. I haven’t been able to reach him on the phone, and I checked with his building super, he didn’t come home last night. Whilst that may not be unusual in and off itself, he also missed a dinner reservation yesterday with a friend.”

It would be Morgan who picked up on what she’d said. “What do you mean it’s not unusual for him not to go home at night. Where else would he be?”

Garcia was on her phone. “It rang for half a minute then went to voicemail. Could he just be busy?”

“For more than twelve hours? I’ve left enough messages that even if he was really, really busy, he would have at least touched base to say so.”

“Okay,” Hotch said. “Let’s get to work.”

 

“It doesn’t feel right,” Garcia said quietly. “Reid wouldn’t want us digging into his life.”

“We have to if we are going to find him. Not that I even know where to begin.” Rossi shuffled a few papers and sighed.

The team looked up as Alex walked in and closed the door behind her. “Okay, I have something I need to say that is going to be difficult for you to hear.”

Garcia teared up. “Please tell me he’s not dead.”

“No, god, no. But if we are going to accurately study the victimology there are things you need to know.”

“Since when did you become an expert on Spencer?” Pointed accusation from Morgan. Of course.

“Can we focus?” Hotch gestured for Alex to continue.

“You all love Reid, I know you do, and maybe because I’m the late comer to the team he confides in me about…things.”

Garcia dropped her head into her hands. “Oh, god, I can explain.”

Alex raised her hand to stop them all talking. “There’s no need. There’s no need for you all to panic about what I’m about to say. The thing is…Reid is sleeping with all of you.”

Only Morgan found his voice. “What the hell?” He stood up so fast his chair hit the floor.

“Morgan, sit down.” Hotch sighed. 

Garcia grinned. “The little tinker.”

It was Morgan who found his voice again. “No, I don’t believe it.”

J.J looked at him. “Are you sleeping with him? Because I was, until Will, Garcia has already practically admitted it. What about you Hotch?” Hotch nodded once. “Rossi?” 

“Guilty as charged.” Rossi looked at Morgan. “We all know the kid’s a special cookie. I don’t think our judgement around his lifestyle is going to help find him.”

“Blake, what about you?” J.J continued.

“Not really. We’ve had a moment or two, but my tastes run in a different direction. It’s why we’ve become such good friends.”

J.J. looked back to Morgan. “So, are you, of all people, the one who gets openly jealous, and swoons off your seat every time he walks into the room, you are going to tell me you’re the only one who wasn’t?”

Morgan was up and out of the door before Hotch could caution him again. Alex followed. “Morgan, I know this is difficult for you…”

Morgan kicked the wall and turned on his heel to face her. “Do you? Do you really? And how do you know that?”

“You love him, I get it, and you know Spencer loves you too. Not like the others, Spencer is in love with you, and you can shout and argue, and break up and make up, or whatever you both need to do to get past this, but you can’t do any of that unless we find him, Morgan.” She chanced a gentle hand on his arm. The coiled energy thrummed under her hand. “He needs you. He needs us to work together to find him.”

“Okay. But if we find him alive, I’m going to kill him myself.”

 

“Time is ticking by, people.” Rossi clapped his hands to get the team’s attention. “Have we traced his last movements yet?” 

“I think I have it. I had to check a few times, because, well…because it seems our baby boy was holding more secrets than we could have imagined.” Garcia brought up a series of pictures on the main screen. “This is one Spencer Hamilton. Yes, our boy has an alter-ego. He is a world-renowned runway and fashion model who has walked for…well, every major designer, appeared in magazines like Vogue, Harper’s, Vanity Fair, GQ, and graces adds and commercials for Calvin Klein, Armani, Brioni, Tommy Hilfiger, the list goes on.”

Morgan sat back in his chair. “How could we not know, I mean who is this kid?”

Rossi grabbed a file and started flicking through. “It’s not in his FBI file.”

“Oh, it is,” Garcia said. “On a very high shelf where mere mortals such as ourselves are not allowed to peek.”

“In other words, Gideon knew and buried it, so it wouldn’t affect his career with the Bureau.” Hotch concentrated on the pictures.

“He signed up with a modelling agency at nineteen, hasn’t worked as much since joining the BAU, but still takes the occasional gig which is where he was Saturday afternoon from noon until four-thirty, at a photoshoot for Harper’s at a studio downtown. I’ve already contacted the photographer—none other than the Mario Testino—well, I got to speak to an assistant, who has sent over the details of the shoot and all the footage and images, and there are a ton of ‘em.” Garcia took a breath. “And when you see them, you will realise why we would never in a million years realise they were photos of our baby. I mean, I realise now that I have seen him in Vogue, and Tattler, but…”

“Garica…” Hotch brought her rant to an end. 

“Okay, so I also have a list of other models in attendance at the shoot. There were two who left at the same time as Reid. Details are on your phones.”

“Okay, Morgan and Blake take the models, Rossi and I will head to the studio. J.J, Garcia comb through everything you can find relating to Spencer Hamilton.”

“Oh, one more thing.” The team centred their focus back on Garcia. “I also found a couple of tumblrs dedicated to Spencer Hamilton, the usual social media cover—Facebook pages, Instagrams, and there are a couple that stand out with a creepy stalker vibe. One has pictures of Reid arriving and leaving shoots, which would suggest he has details of Reid’s shoot schedule, though I couldn’t find any connection to the agency. But I think it’s fair to say we are looking at the abduction of Spencer Hamilton, model extraordinaire, rather than FBI Profiler Dr. Spencer Reid.”

“Why do you think that?”

“None of these sites have any photos of our Spencer. They are all based around the activities of Hamilton. A few swanky fashion parties, photoshoots, launch parties, but nothing even remotely connected to the FBI. I checked with the agency, and they didn’t even know Reid had another job. I sent over a couple of photos of our Spencer and his agent barely recognised him from his ID.”

“Who has access to his schedule?”

“She said there are any number of people who could find out details of the jobs he’s booked onto. They have tried to tighten things up after another male model had a crazy female stalker back last year, but models still report fans outside of studios and on location shoots.”

“Any fan mail received for Hamilton?”

“The usual. Nothing creepy or threatening. They have it all at the office. She said Spencer never collects it.”

“Which could enrage anyone trying to connect with him,” Morgan said. “Have they noticed any one person sending more than one letter?”

“There is one guy who sends a letter every month. His name is Darren. He also has a tumblr, but not the creepy stalker one. Its still a little creepy, but, well they all are, aren’t they?”

“Do we have an address?”

“Nothing I’ve found, the guy is like a ghost, but I will track him down. I do have an address for the creepy stalker vibe girl, however, and have sent it to your phones.”

“Okay, Rossi and I will take the female fan, Morgan add the agency to your list for those letters. Garcia, find Darren. Let’s go.”

 

Reid had one of his headaches. The first since following the protocol Maeve had given him. However, as he tried to massage his temples he realised he was restrained. Metal handcuffs, so not restrained in a good way. His vision was blurry to begin with, and his eyes felt gritty. Shit, he still had his contacts in. That wouldn’t be a good experience, taking those out. The apartment he was in came in to view. It was nice. High ceilings, so a loft or warehouse conversion of some kind. Brick built with exposed metal beams, lots of art on the walls of…oh. Reid’s stomach flipped. Every picture on the huge wall he was facing—and there had to be fifty, no, more, was of him. Well, of Spencer Hamilton. All professional ads and campaigns he’d worked. 

“Do you like it?” A soft male voice asked from behind him somewhere.

“It’s…impressive. A great collection.”

“I knew you would.”

Reid tried to sit up, but his hands were in the way behind him. “Um, can you uncuff me? I’d like to sit up, take a better look at them, if that’s okay?”

“Oh, gosh, yes, of course. I’m sorry.” The guy appeared in front of Reid. He was maybe a few years younger, handsome in an unconventional way, much like Reid in fact. “I uh, I’m sorry about the…” he pointed to his own head. 

“The cuffs?”

“Yes. Um…”

“You can put them back on with my hands in front if you like.”

“Oh, yes, that’s a good idea.”

Reid rolled on to his stomach on what was a very comfortable couch, and the guy uncuffed his hands. He rolled back to a sitting position and massaged his temples. “Do you have any contact lens solution? Mine are drying out. I should have removed them before sleeping.”

“I didn’t know. I would have taken them out for you. Oh, god, are you going to be okay?”

“It’ll be fine. I just need some drops. Can you get some for me?”

“I’ll go to the pharmacy.”

“We could go together, I can show you which one to buy.”

“No, no, you have to stay here. I, uh…” the guy cuffed Reid’s hands to a heavy industrial shelving unit next to the sofa. “I won’t be long. Do you want something to eat?”

“No thank you. A coffee would be good though. Black, lots of sugar.”

The guy gave a shy smile. “I’ll be right back.”

“Wait. You never gave me your name.”

He frowned at Reid. “It’s me, it’s Darren. I thought you’d recognise me.”

“Darren… We can talk about it when you get back.”

“But I write to you, every month. God…” Darren stamped his foot. “I knew they weren’t sending them on to you.”

“You did hit me over the head, Darren. Maybe I’m just not remembering at the moment. The coffee should help.”

“Right. Coffee, and contact lens solution.”

Reid huffed out a sigh as the main door closed. He never had any normal fans. He looked around the apartment, trying to avoid the portraits mocking him. There were huge windows along one wall, maybe he could get his bearings from some landmarks. He stood carefully, sliding the handcuffs up the post of the bookcase. He patted his pockets and was amazed to find he still had his phone. It took some fiddling and wriggling against the bookcase, but he managed to take out his phone and put it on the shelf. He called the first person he thought of. Morgan.

 

Morgan looked at the caller ID. “It’s Reid,” he said to Blake. “Reid? Where the hell are you?”

“I’m being held by a delightful young man called Darren. I can’t quite figure out where his apartment is from the view.”

Trust Reid to make light of a serious situation. “Is he there?”

“No, he’s gone out for coffee and contact lens solution. Morgan, he’s harmless, you can’t come in hot, okay?”

“Reid, he abducted you.”

“Other than the bump on the head, I’m fine and he is harmless. He’s gone to the pharmacy because he’s worried about my contact lenses. Morgan, please. By all means come get me, but keep your weapons holstered until he gives you reason not to.”

“Does he have a gun?”

“Not that I’ve seen. He’ll be back soon. I’ll put my phone back in my pocket but leave the line open so Garcia can trace it.”

“You can’t get out of the apartment?”

“I’m handcuffed to an extremely sturdy bookcase.”

“I’ll mute the call, so he won’t hear anything from my end. We’ll be there as soon as we can. Just hang tight, pretty boy.”

“That’s all I can do for the moment.”

Morgan muted the call and turned to Blake. “Get Garcia to trace Reid’s phone, the line is open. It’s Darren, the letter guy.”

Within a few minutes they had the address and were heading there with SWAT as back up in case things went south. Morgan didn’t care what Reid said, he wasn’t leaving anything to chance. They were still five minutes away when they heard Darren come back into the apartment.

 

“You’re still here.” Darren seemed genuinely surprised and Reid smiled. 

“You handcuffed me to the bookcase. I’m not Houdini.”

Darren laughed. “You’re funny. I knew you would be nice. I have everything you wanted.” He held up a holder with two cups, and a bag.

“Okay. If you uncuff me, I can go to the bathroom and use the drops. Then we can sit and have that coffee. How does that sound?”

He put everything on the counter but hesitated. “Good. You, you won’t hurt me, will you?”

“Darren, I really just need to sort out my contact lenses. My eyes are really sore.”

“Oh, okay.” Darren took off the cuffs and stepped back. “The bathroom is through there.” He pointed to the door farthest away from the entry way. Reid took the plastic bag from the counter and went into the bathroom. He took a minute to relieve himself, before checking the drops, and using them. He checked his lenses were still mobile and headed back into the main living area.

“That’s so much better. Thank you. Now how about that coffee?” He heard the click before he saw the gun. “Darren? What’s wrong? You don’t need to point a gun at me.”

“Are you sure you aren’t going to hurt me for bringing you here?”

“Do you want to hurt me, Darren?”

“No, no, I just wanted to meet you. I’ve followed your work from the beginning. I was at New York Fashion Week with my mother, you walked for three designers that week.” 

“I remember my first shows there. That was um, Michael Kors…”

“Yes.” Darren waved the gun around. “You wore a blue suit.”

“With contrast stitching.”

“I knew you’d remember.”

“So, we’ve known each other a long time. I don’t need to hurt you, and you don’t need to hurt me, so shall we put the gun away?”

“Oh,” Darren threw the gun on the sofa and Reid flinched. “It’s not loaded. I wasn’t sure whether I would have to hit you with it again.”

That would be the headache. Reid relaxed a little and made a slow move for the coffee. The team were on the way, all he had to do was keep Darren talking. “Shall we sit down? You can tell me about the photos you’ve collected.”

 

When Morgan crept into the loft he couldn’t believe his eyes. Reid was sat in a chair, Darren was on the sofa, and they were laughing. 

“Is everything okay, Reid?”

Darren snapped to Morgan. “Who’s Reid? Who are you, why are you in my apartment?”

“Darren this is my friend, Morgan. He’s probably been worried about me.”

“Reid, are you okay?”

“The gun is on the kitchen counter. I’m fine. Darren, you know it’s illegal for you to kidnap someone, right? We talked about this, that the police would want to speak to you. And I would tell them you were very good to me.”

“Oh, is Morgan the police?”

“I’m with the FBI, Darren. We’ve come to take Spencer home.”

“Okay.” Darren looked at Reid. “You’ll come visit me though, right?”

“It might not be possible, but I will try, Darren, and I’ll definitely write to you, okay?”

“I just knew you’d be lovely. I loved you the first time I saw you, Spencer. Will you take care of my pictures?”

Reid’s vision blurred, and he sniffed, feeling a tickle at his nose. “I’ll see what I can do.” He wiped his face and came away with blood on his hand. “Morgan?” 

 

Morgan handed off the hysterical Darren screaming he didn’t do it and Morgan had ruined everything to Hotch for cuffs and ran to Reid as he slumped over in the chair, a trail of blood across his face from his nose. “Reid? Spencer? I need a medic,” he called. 

 

“Are you eating my jello, again?”

Morgan looked up and smiled. “Why is the first thing you always think of when you wake up in hospital jello?”

“It’s not the first thing, but you’re already here.” Morgan sighed heavily, and Reid’s heart broke just a little bit. “I’m sorry you had to find out that way. I was planning to tell you.”

“Tell me what, that you’re a completely different person than the one I…”

“I’m not a different person. I’ve always just been me.”

“You’ve been leading a double life, Reid. You even have another name.”

“I have never kept anything from you. I have never lied to you. Are you going to blame me because you didn’t ask the right questions, because you weren’t really that interested in what I was doing when I wasn’t with you?”

“How many people have you slept with?”

“I don’t know.”

“You have an eidetic memory. Is it really so many that even you can’t remember?”

“I didn’t say I don’t remember, I said I don’t know. I don’t keep count of sexual partners in the same way I don’t keep track of the cups of coffee I’ve had in the last month, or the number of times I ate pizza last year. How many women have you slept with Morgan? Given our age difference, I’m sure we’re pretty much on a par, or were you only interested in me because you thought I was an innocent little flower only you had touched?”

“No, what? No. I just…”

“I get it. You’re not interested anymore. So why are you here? Or do you feel you need to be a gentleman and tell me to my face you don’t want to fuck me anymore? Message received. You can go now.”

“Reid…Spencer…”

“I’m tired. Please leave. I’m sure the rest of the team have plenty to say and will want to come in here to make me feel guilty for being me.”

“That’s not it. Spencer, please.”

“I don’t feel guilty. Just so you know. I like to make people happy, I like to make people feel good. But don’t worry. I’ll resign from the BAU so you don’t have work with me anymore.”

“Enough.” Morgan rested on the edge of the bed, dangerously close. “I am not trying to make you feel guilty, I am trying to understand.”

“Then ask a question that means something.”

“How can you go through every day, working with the team, and having sex with all of us? Do you think, ‘oh, Hotch is looking good today, I want me some of that’? Tell me how it works, Spencer. Tell me what happened to make you decide when it was my turn?”

Reid sighed. “I think I should speak to the doctor.”

“You have a minor concussion and had a regular nose bleed. They said you fainted likely due to the stress. All scans are normal, all tests so far normal. Now answer the question you wanted me to ask.”

“You know how socially awkward I am, Morgan.”

“And yet you are some kind of sex whisperer, it seems.”

“I’ve been having sex since I was fourteen years old. Consensual sex, before you get on your high horse, and mostly with kids my own age until I was legal. It’s the one social thing I can do well. And I like it.”

“Like sex in general, or fucking everything you meet?”

“If you want me to be honest with you, you need to keep a lid on your judgement.” Morgan at least had the decency to look sheepish. “Sex is a way of communication for me. I don’t have the usual attachments or associations most people do. I don’t see it as a taboo subject, or something that should only be shared with one person your entire life. At least, I didn’t.” Reid reached for Morgan’s hand. “I love you, Derek. I’m in love with you. You need to tell me now whether you are going to be able to move past this, whether you want to be with me.”

“Be with you how?”

“I’ve been thinking about it the last few weeks, the last month, and I was going to tell you this weekend before…Darren happened, but I’d like to make a life with you. If you think you could with a man, if you could with me.”

“Spencer, as much as I love you, as much as I am in love with you, there is no point me promising everything will be okay, that we can build something and have a nice life when I know you’re sleeping with other people. I’d be lying to both of us if I tell you that’s okay.”

Spencer smiled. “You’re in love with me?”

“Spencer, I’ve loved you from day one, been in love with for a long, long, time, but I won’t pretend sharing you is going to work for me.”

Reid squeezed Morgan’s hand. “You don’t have to share me. It’s what I was going to tell you. We last had sex three weeks ago, yes?”

“About that.”

“And I hadn’t slept with anyone else for ten days before that. I haven’t slept with anyone since you.”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

“I wanted to be sure, before I asked you for something more formal, that I could be just for you. I realised I’d have to not have sex at all, not even with you, to be sure I wasn’t addicted to sex itself. And I’m not. I’ve missed you. Missed us. But I haven’t even thought about anyone else. I want to be with you, Derek, just you.” Reid let go of Morgan’s hand. “But I understand if it’s not enough. If you’ll be haunted by the things you know about me. I can’t live knowing that every time we’re together you’ll be wondering about my past.”

Morgan took Reid’s hand in his. “Hundreds.”

“What?”

“Even with a basic calculation, taking into consideration how many years I’ve been sexually active and a figure of two women a month—some months is higher, some lower—the number of women I have slept with is three figures. Though the last year has seen a significant drop due to my growing interest in you. When we’re together are you going to be wondering about my past lovers?”

“I’ve never once thought of them.”

“I never once thought of yours. At least not until the early hours of this morning.” Morgan shook his head. “I still can’t get Rossi out of my head, though.” Reid thought he would cry until Morgan laughed. “I can’t promise it’ll be plain sailing, kid, that I won’t have more questions, and as much as I would hope not to throw this whole thing in your face when we argue, I am still human, but I’d like to try. To build something. With you.”

“That is music to my soul.”

Morgan leaned in to kiss tenderly. “So, I guess if it’s just me on your schedule, I’m going to be pretty busy in the bedroom, huh?”

Reid grinned into the kiss. “You have no idea, Derek. No idea. In fact,” Reid pulled Morgan onto the bed with an ‘oomph’, “I think we should start catching up right now.”


End file.
